Let's get you up to speed.

Okay, almost a week since I blogged...must be slippin'. So I did join the ranks of MySpace. Did a fancy to do to my webpage...I think I'm good for now.

I took a few days to recoup after the well mannered frivolity of Fish and Chip's B-day. :/ Anyway, I was good by Monday but I, fortunately for me, took the day off...and what a day to take off. Nice rainy day to sit inside and watch movies. I'm banking on Netflix btw. Four movies every delivery and a 100 hours a month online to watch movies. The 100 hours might go to waste but not the four flicks. The first batch was Space Camp, And Now for Something Completely Different, Gwendoline, and Fast Times at Ridgemont High. I loved Space Camp as a kid, now, it was too short. And Now for Something Completely Different was just Flying Circus only about 2 hours of it...same skits just redone. Fast Times is, well, a classic. But the shining star was Gwendoline. Starring Tawny Kataen (the girl from a few 80's hair band videos...mostly White Snake), in her second (and most important of the time since she gets naked) film. This film is a bit like Romancing the Stone and Jewel of the Nile, only it was done by a French director who loves the female body, apparently...LOTS of naked chicks in non-pornographic and some very sexually suggestive scenes. By far the winner of the four. Just that it has the making of having been a classic romance novel of today. I enjoyed it a lot, not just because of the many naked (possibly French, oui?) ladies.

The Second batch is a bit more lewd. Undead, A Virgin Among the Living Dead, Frankenhooker, and a double feature, Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker/Filthy McNasty. I've seen Undead but fell asleep last time, now I know why. A Virgin Among the Living Dead, I had to fast forward through...old film with the gratuitous nudity but the problem was WAY too long scenes of people walking and no talking...just walking. And it had a bad habit of doing the Dragon Ball Z stuff of flipping back and forth between two characters faces for like 20 scenes in a row each about 5+ secs. Frankenhooker was just fun. It was a movie that knew it was going to be bad so it had fun doing it. The big thing about Frankenhooker is that it starred an ex-penthouse girl Patty Mullen in her second of 2 films. Normally this isn't big news, what is is that she died in '96 in Chicago. She apparently was very overweight by then, was called the 'fat lady' by her neighbors, and was a mother of 3 girls, which were the ones who found her body. However, the biggest news is that this was a big case in Chicago because of what happened after she was found. When the police found her body, naked in the tub, after forensic stuff, they dragged her corpse into the living room, completely exposed, and sat in her kitchen raiding her fridge, then they dragged her body out into the front of her lawn, also completely exposed, and neighbors were overheard saying 'the fat lady is dead, quick raid her kitchen'. The family sued the CPD for extreme misconduct. Unfortunately, the courts had it tied up for so long that by the time the courts decided in favor of the family all the cops involved were no longer working for the force also, a recompense was established in the fining the police involved a month's salary. But since the family had also moved away by this time or had passed on, the notice was never delivered and currently resides in the CPD return mail box. The 3 daughters are living with a friend of the family. In light of this atrocity, an organization was built for the mistreatment of obese people, with this case being their flagship. Frankenhooker was funny,...she was a funny lady.
And the double feature. Man 'o man. You know, I've seen and love the humor of Troma, a NJ independent film company, but man. These 2 films were made by the same man Chris Seaver and by a company called Low Budget Films, which works with Troma,...and we are talking very low budget, like $500. Both were hilarious though, even though they over use the 'running gag'. Highly entertaining though. Mulva is about a girl's first time going trick or treating, at the age of 23. And a zombie uprising happens. Annoying,... very annoying voice (suppose to be), but entertaining. Filthy McNasty is about 2 girls want to be pretty and use a demon, call Fil (Phil), to make that dream come true. He does and promptly kills many people in the process, some through sex. Also entertaining. Basically two films to watch when you are in the mood to not take anything seriously.

The next 4 come today: Filthy McNastier/Filthy McNastiest (double feature), Mulva 2: Kill Teen Ape (Teen Ape is a running character in all Chris Seaver's films), The Quest for Egg Salad (a mock of Lord of the Rings, also by Chris Seaver), and Doom Asylum (Patty Mullen's other film). Lots of fun in store.

You may ask, why so many films? Well, I have a shit ton of stuff I just want to see on my wishlists, not buy, just see. And Netflix has finally gotten a broad enough range that they have about 95% of those films so that is why. Why so much at one time though, well, I don't really want Netflix and I have over 250 films I want to see. So, crunch time.

And as a cliff hanger; for the next 2 weeks, starting today, I will not be in contact with anyone. I'm doing my fast gawd damn it. I'm no going out, I'm not hanging with friends, I'm not socialising. I realize this doesn't mean much for many people but I'm tired of starting and stopping this fast. So, sorry for all I have made plans with, but I need to finish this before I go crazy.