Shrek the Third

Absolutely the worst movie ever. I don't say this lightly (as some of you know). First let's get down to the core of what made the other films so good. The journey. Everything that happened while on the journey was what made the story, the character development, plot. In Shrek 3 the journey is all of like 2 minutes (thanks to a wizard). Second, Character development. The only reason I can fathom as to why there was only one-line character development, is due to the fact that we the audience are suppose to know who these people are already. I'm not talking about Shrek, donkey, Fiona, etc. I'm talking about the newbies of the film. Merlin, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel, Captain Hook, the Evil stepsister, etc, and wtf Evil enchanted trees, what the hell are these from.

The villains of our fairy tales play a big role in this film and they are merely glossed over as "the villains".

This movie was slapped together by people who don't care what the audience thinks of it. It was very lack lustered. The endings of these films are huge singing scenes, this film had the main actors credits rolling while donkey and puss'n boots sing against a black back drop. What the hell.

Not to mention the main villain of the story. Prince Charming. First he is pathetic actor and everyone hates him, then he is a leader of the villain army by smooth talking his way into their folds, then he is pathetic again when confronted by Shrek and gang. Barely any action. Just a whole bunch of whining on the screen of "I don't wanna" sort of mentality.

The only redeeming quality (which does very little in redeeming it) is the baby shower gang. Fiona and four of the main princesses of Disney. Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Cinderella, and Rapunzel. These characters are voiced by the former ladies of Saturday Night Live. This is where the movie should have gone. All the classic comedy tools were used here. Sleeping Beauty is a narcoleptic, who during one scene I could barely keep my pop from coming out my nose. She was sleeping and abruptly wakes her self up through snoring and pops up looking around and says "Who Dat" in as deep as a voice as she can. Cinderella has OCD about cleaning, which if you stretch it leads to her being a little crazy. She just rambles about cleaning and one the other princesses tells her to shut up and she repeats it to herself under breath, which is actually her saying it to her reflection in the floor, then tells to herself to stay out of it. Rapunzel thinks everyone is jealous of her hair (not much character development here since we see so little of her), and Snow White, who apparently gets the most camera time and lines. She is argumentative and snobby. And it all because she knows that she is "fairest one of all". Also, her baby shower present to Fiona is a live-in babysitter (a dwarf). When they girls get into the thick of it Snow White tears off her sleeves to reveal a heart tattoo on her arm with Dopey's name in it. And then with her beautiful signing voice she summons all woodland creatures to come to her beckon. The music changes to Led Zeppelin's - Immigrant Song making all the woodland creatures attack. These are classic comedy avenues that should have been explore more deeply. This could have been the greatest movie if this were the focus. But these wonderful ladies only comprise a total of about 15 minutes of the film. Sad, very sad indeed.

Overall, very bad movie. And let me tell you I had extremely low hopes for this film and it murdered each and everyone of them.